Life and Lies of Being Twenty-Something

when they’re in their natural habitat…

and it was a lot like the last one. It was as if we were really together, like it wasn’t a dream but a different reality where we were nothing but souls. This time though you weren’t in the hospital or on the brink of death, you were simply crying. You were mad at me for telling people about you and all the things I thought you’d done. You were crying like I’ve never seen, you were a total wreck. I wanted to just hold you, kiss you, tell you I was sorry and that everything was going to be alright. I could feel you so close to me, so cemented in the deepest reaches of my heart and soul that I was sure something was wrong. I saw you not as you were, but as you are, and I felt all your pain.
I know you’re suffering, and I know you feel alone and scared, but I promise you you’re not nor will you ever be. I know it’s been years, but I still love you and think about you almost daily. I wish I could hold you, wish I could kiss you„ wish I could tell you in person everything was going to be fine. I don’t know how to continue, I don’t know how to advance in life if you’re the reason for it. I loved you so long, and still do, but I cannot let you be an anchor.
I wish you all the best, and will be here anytime you need me, but this is me attempting to move on for the millionth time… hopefully it works.